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21 results for "cincinnati bengals"

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  1. I Suck at Football, Week 18: The Barrel-of-Fun Room

    Alex Pappademas

    I finally got cable installed in my basement office, just in time to watch the Bengals collapse in the first round of the playoffs for the third consecutive year. 27-10, Chargers win. It was a pleasure to watch this happen in the comfort of my home, ...

    Blog | January 13, 2014
  2. I Suck at Football, Week 2.14: They Call Me Gavin Baseball

    Alex Pappademas

    Thursday 11/28 Lions 40, Packers 10 Over Thanksgiving, Lord Kelvin and Niels Bohr ask me what I think Kurt Cobain would be doing if he were alive today. I'm weirdly super-prepared for this question because I've spent an afternoon writing 47-Year-Ol...

    Blog | December 12, 2013
  3. I Suck at Football 2.11: I Am Sitting in a Room b/w Two Dicks on ...

    Alex Pappademas

    I watched almost no football this week, except for the last three quarters of the Seahawks/Vikings game, because a tense match between the Lords Disick and Richard Feynman's team potentially hinged for me on Marshawn Lynch's performance in that game....

    Blog | November 19, 2013
  4. I Suck at Football 2.10: Where I Was Drunk

    Alex Pappademas

    I fly to New York with Lonely Bunny in my pocket. Lonely Bunny is one of my daughter's finger puppets. He makes the tip of your finger look like a white rabbit popping out of a gray top hat. I document Lonely Bunny's trip and send the pictures to my ...

    Blog | November 14, 2013
  5. I Suck at Football 2.9: Snow Falling on Quad Box

    Alex Pappademas

    This year Halloween fell on a Thursday. That morning brings the first real roster controversy of the Ryan Kuhlman era. I bench Denarius Moore from the Raiders to start Marvin Jones from the Bengals. When I tell Ryan I've done this over email, he advi...

    Blog | November 05, 2013
  6. I Suck at Football 2.8: The Ryan Kuhlman Era

    Alex Pappademas

    My Wi-Fi has been down all day. One Chrome window hangs open and useless, a monument to the last thing I looked at before bed last night - Gmail, a message from my dad, with ads in the margins for Brazilian jiu-jitsu classes and fracking equipm...

    Blog | October 30, 2013
  7. I Suck at Football 2.7: The Mirror Game

    Alex Pappademas

    Your wife is too good at recognizing actors' faces. Since moving to L.A. she keeps experiencing false-positive IDs. Sometimes she'll see someone in a store or across a crowded restaurant and become convinced it's someone she knows, maybe an old cowor...

    Blog | October 23, 2013
  8. I Suck at Football 2.6: My Self-Absorption and Me

    Alex Pappademas

    Enrico Fermi is in town for a wedding. He has got a bunch of plans but he asks if he can watch football with me on Sunday. I tell him to meet me at 10, at Ye Rustic, my place of business. I'm there at 9:57. They've got the Bengals/Bills game on the T...

    Blog | October 15, 2013
  9. I Suck at Football 2.4: White People! Stop Looking for Ghosts!

    Alex Pappademas

    I've been to Las Vegas four or five times. It's always for work, which means I always go by myself. Public service announcement: Don't do this. There's being alone, and then there's solitude, which is aloneness plus contemplation. It's useful alonene...

    Blog | October 01, 2013
  10. I Suck at Football 2.3: Time-Travel Beard

    Alex Pappademas

    On Sunday, the Bengals apparently became the first team in NFL history to turn a 14-point lead into a 16-point deficit and still eke out a win, which is easily the most archetypally Bengals-ish record ever set. I'm hanging out in front of m...

    Blog | September 24, 2013
  11. I Suck at Football: Inebriates of the Air

    Alex Pappademas

    Big week this week for my first-ever fantasy football team, the Lords Disick, which is remarkable because the Lords Disick are a terrible team. I've never been in an auction draft before and I blew all my fake money in the first two or three rounds a...

    Blog | September 18, 2013
  12. I Suck at Football 2.0: The Ghost of Jack-Daniel Duncanhines

    Alex Pappademas

    So I get to Ye Rustic just before ten in the morning, and down at the end of the bar there's this gray-haired guy drinking a whiskey and eating a piece of chocolate cake. You think you were ready for some football on Sunday? You were not as "ready fo...

    Blog | September 10, 2013
  13. I Suck at Football, Week 18: Nolo Contendere

    Alex Pappademas

    My sister finds an apartment and a roommate and moves out of my house the morning of the last Bengals game of the season. It takes maybe 30 minutes to ferry her boxes out of my office and up the driveway to a U-Haul and then another 45 to rebuild the...

    Blog | January 08, 2013
  14. I Suck at Football, Week 15: If DeMarco Murray's Butt Were Candie...

    Alex Pappademas

    Erwin Schrödinger's in town, so we meet at Ye Rustic on Thursday night. The Bengals are playing the Eagles, and for some reason this historic contest of champions is being broadcast in prime time. Schrödinger and I are, respectively, the th...

    Blog | December 18, 2012
  15. I Suck at Football, Week 14: Back and to the Left

    Alex Pappademas

    On Sunday my sister drives me to the bar so I can watch the Bengals play the Dallas Cowboys. "Well, I hope they win," she says. "But I also hope they lose, so you'll have something new to write about." I don't say anything. She's just trying to be...

    Blog | December 11, 2012
  16. I Suck at Football, Week 13: Human Kindness Is Overflowing

    Alex Pappademas

    "WheelsUp ... Back to Cali on a business trip," the Cincinnati Bengals' Vontaze Burfict (born in Los Angeles in 1990) tells his 4,862 Twitter followers on Thursday. Between "WheelsUp" and "Back to Cali," he types three little Emoji airplanes, like a ...

    Blog | December 04, 2012