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The latest development in conference expansion may be the funniest. The 98-pound weaklings at college football's Muscle Beach are puffing out their scrawny chests and (at least temporarily) stopping a reconfiguration of the entire nation.

The Dash chomps through the grass with Les Miles and LSU, recommends some sideline snacks, dines on some all-you-can-eat mediocrity and more.

From players, coaches and games to surprises and busts, The Dash's midterm exam runs through it all.

Ready to play a little Bowl-der Dash? With the 34-game bowl-season sprint from Washington, D.C., to Miami about to kick off, The Dash picks the winners.

From Iowa saving America from the Big Ten to the battle of Big 12 vs. SEC, the Dash runs through it all.

From the Big 12's Haves and Have-Nots to the extent of hiding signals to the SEC's lack of offense, the Dash runs through it all.

From the wealth of Big 12 QB talent to a rewind on the Cremation in the Coliseum to unnoticed undefeateds, the Dash runs through it all.

From updating the coaching chaos department to The Border War to rivalry games, the Dash runs through it all.

From breaking down the insane Big 12 season to praise for Charlie Weis to 10 flavors of the week, the Dash runs through it all.

From a Holy Trinity moment to the November nine to rating the top gunslingers, The Dash laterals his way through it all.

From appraising the 16 hats currently tossed in the title ring to Mohawks to Forte's latest sprint, The Dash runs through it all.

From upsets to coaches to busts to worst fan reactions to conference calls, The Dash's run through the midseason report has it all.

It's not easy to quantify underachievement but you know it when you see it, writes Pat Forde.